Today I am realizing how true the saying goes “There’s A Thin Line Between Love & Hate”. Have you ever loved someone so much you almost hated them? Have you loved so hard that the pain that you feel has turned your love into hate?
I have or shall I say I think I have. I do not like the word hate. It is too strong for my taste. I would rather speak about what I love. But what happens when what I love becomes what I hate?
Love sometimes is such a great burden, at least for me. Every single person that I love has hurt me extremely deep. I’m not talking about the kind of hurt that you get over in a couple of months. I’m talking about the hurt that you have to pray to not want to hurt them back. The kind of hurt that makes me understand why people snap. The kind of hurt that rips your heart into shreds and leaves you feeling broken alone and confused.
I hate the people I love but I love them too much to hate them for real. Oh what a battle I fight constantly. In one breath I love them and want them to be happy and in the next I want to punch them in the face!!
Love is not what I imagined it to be. It’s way more ferocious then I once thought. That is why love should not be taken lightly. You should never ask for love. Why do I say this? Because love runs deep into you like air. Touching pieces of your soul that you normally don’t feel. It can make you mad. Love makes you mad. Love makes me mad. Sometimes I hate that I love, but I know that I am nothing without it.
I cannot kill what I love even when it kills me. I cannot harm who I love even tho they harm me. I cannot fight against love because I need love to breathe. Oh love why do you have to be so hard.
Love is patient, Love is kind, Love is LONG Suffering….
Attempting to master just these 3 parts of love breaks my heart daily.
Love is not just words that you say to someone. Love is an action word. I’m so tired of seeing people painting pictures of love, but not acting in love. Love is something you do, it’s something you practice. You do not know what love is until you are put to the test.
LOVE IS being KIND when you want to punch someone in the face. Love is being PATIENT as those you love tear you to shreds. Love is LONG SUFFERING when you watch those you love, love someone else instead of you. Love does not ENVY when you see others being blessed while you wait on your turn.
LOVE does not BOAST about who it is and what it does to others because it’s too precious to be flaunted in others faces. LOVE is PROTECTIVE!!
I really don’t know what’s worse with love.. the hoping for love or the trusting in love that one day things will be better. Believing that one day you will be loved in return. How do you persevere through love when your heart is abandoned like a blighted home?
The hoping for love is painful, the absence of love is dreadful, yet life without love is pointless. Why oh why does love have to be such a double edged sword??? Why does love have to be soooo frikin’ hard?
Why can’t we all just Be love? Act in love? Show love? Admit love? Walk in Love?
Instead we become victims of failing love. Conditional love. Unrequited love.
It’s a shame what we have done to love. Families are broken everyday because of this. People no longer value real love or exemplify unconditional love. Love is not I love you if… if you do this.. if you don’t do this.. NOPE that’s not love at all.
Love is me telling you happy birthday when the last few years you didn’t remember mine. Love is welcoming people with open arms even tho it was their arms that pushed you away. Love is saying even tho you are self-seeking, I am not. Love is saying yes to the very people who told you no.
Love is interesting it is not made for the weak at heart. You must be strong to endure love. You must be a WARRIOR to BE LOVE. Don’t ask for love my darlings for it is a peculiar thing. The desire for love is far better than the falling in love, in my opinion.
Why do I say this?
Because I have fallen in love. Not because I chose to, but because it chose me. So now that I am a prisoner of love it is my duty to tell you the truth about what it is and how it feels. However I stand in hope that although love has beaten me up I believe that the scripture, 1 Corinthians 13:4-8. is correct when it says that love never fails.
If love is what keeps me bound then surely it is love that must set me free. I pray that if you are reading this and you are in love (true love) that love sets you free. I pray that love gives you wings to fly and that you are able to smile and rejoice in love.
To those that are seeking love. I warn you DO NOT SEEK LOVE. Seek happiness instead. For happiness is not dependent on love. You can be happy by choice. It is love that one does not choose. Wait until love chooses you.
How will you know when love chooses you??? You just will know. You will know because it will over power you. You will know because it will break your pride. You will know because you cannot turn it off because someone hurt your feelings. Love does not let you walk away. It will not let you give up. It will not let you overcome it. Why???
BE:CAUSE LOVE CONQUERS ALL
God Bless You Readers & Subscribers!! Hang in there you warriors of love!! Keep fighting the good fight of faith. Pray for me too that I can endure to the end for I know what it is to love. I feel your pain. I refuse to give up on love because although it is tough I’d rather live with love then to live my life without it. That is why I feel like a prisoner bound by the same thing that sets me free.
Peace Love & Blessings to each of you!!